Nuggets and Lakers: Fuck Kobe

Game 7 and the Lakers have just destroyed the Rockets. Even though we won't have any more of that rockets grit and artest music criticism ("5 dollar footlong is a hot song"), I'm sort of happy the Lakers won.  Don't get me wrong, I was cheering for the rockets, but every time the lakers play, we get a villain to boo. Next round, they'll be facing the Nuggets, a tough, healthy team with a roster full of killers.

It's partly kobe hate. He's similar to vintage jordan in his mannerisms, the way he chats up the refs, working for calls with a patronizing scowl on his face. There's the way he chastises teammates, gesturing and yelling while running backwards up court. There's something missing that Jordan had, and that something missing leaves a sour taste. I think, because of his dad's pro pedigree and kobe's european upbringing, he's lacking some street. He's bougie and if there's a player who could make a powdered wig work, it's him. Plus he already speaks French. To me, that image of chris childs landing a flush left right is move vivid than any Mamba dunk.

The rest of the Lakers -- except for Lamar Odom (who's straight thug) and Andrew Bynum -- are bitches, too. Pau Gasol and Sasha vujacic are two of the most annoying whiners in sports. Each foul call against them is a mirage, apparently. When Dwight or Tim smile at a foul call, it's a bit annoying, but when the Lakers swarthy Europeans do it, it's unbearable. I think it's their long hair and, in sasha's case, his soft womanly features. 

The Lakers almost lost to a depleted and under-talented Rockets team because they were getting out-toughed. And the way they retaliated, let's get this straight, wasn't tough. There was kobe's elbow to artest's throat and fishers ass thrust to luis scola. Those are hardwood equivalents to hair-pulling and scratching. Imagine if they were playing a gangster team that actually could score.

Well the nuggets are that team. Their leader chauncey billups embodies toughness and hardwork with his ability to push his teammates without being a prick. And he's called Mr. Big Shot for a reason. He's a general and his soldiers know that he's money in the trenches. With both postup and penetrating skill, he'll be trouble for the lakers punk point guards.

The nuggets matchup favorably everywhere except for shooting guard. Even at the two they have a solid dahntay jones who can finish breaks and at least muscle kobe on d. Charm city's resident don't-snitch-spokesman, carmelo anthony, should be able to get his offense on trevor ariza whenever he wants. And if pau is the stefane dion of big men, k-mart and nene are obama and biden. I'm going to predict that pau won't react favorably to their muscle and he'll disappear like dirk did versus stephen jackson and the warriors a couple years back.

I'm picking the nuggets in 6 because they're almost as talented, but they're twice as tough. Plus, i hate kobe.