The first two parts looked into the lives of Toronto's male and female sex workers; this part will look into the lives of their clients.
'Oliver' loves his wife. Married for 22 years, the father of two hates that he sees 'Jennifer' every other week but he feels like he has no choice. Near tears, he states how he and his wife haven't had sex in nearly 8 years. For weeks after the birth of their second child, his wife refused any sexual advances, claiming that 'she wasn't ready..' Weeks turned into months, months into years-
I love her so much... but I need to be touched.
'Jennifer' explains that for most clients, it's not about sex at all, but intimacy.
If men are just horny, they can take care of that themselves- but the men I see are looking for more. They're looking for love.
Every two weeks Oliver sees Jennifer (at nearly $300 an hour) in her upscale downtown condominium. Jennifer offers a few different 'menu' choices for her clients, but every time Oliver sees her he chooses what Jennifer describes as the 'girlfriend experience'. While traditional prostitutes keep their interactions with their clients as perfunctory as possible, the 'girlfriend experience' includes the kinds of intimate physical acts that a client would expect from a long-term girlfriend, including but not limited to kissing, cuddling, and what Jennifer feels is the most important, conversation.
The most successful girls in this business aren't the hottest, but the nicest. The one's that take the time to talk to the men and make them feel like human beings.
Jennifer's says that in her many years in the business she's never encountered a bad man- just lonely ones. One man in particular made sure to book Jennifer's final time slot available every night in order to ensure that she was safe after every shift.
He wasn't even interested in sex. He'd spend the hour massaging and caressing me, asking me about my day...
Oliver works for the city as a sanitation worker. Blue collar, but unionized, he earns a healthy living after over-time. Oliver makes sure to put aside enough money for his children's post-secondary education, mortgage payments, and his and his wife's RRSPs, but every two weeks he withdraws 270 dollars from a store ATM outside Jennifer's condominium just before their appointment. Him and his wife have attempted couple's counselling both within their church and with a secular marriage counsellor; neither have worked. After two years of celibacy, Oliver began looking to the sex industry. He searched online on a friend's computer, and that's when he found Jennifer. Ironically, their first meeting contained very little sex.
The way (Jennifer) touched me, made me feel wanted... I broke down in tears.
'Marcus', like Oliver is married, but claims he only began seeing escorts after he and his wife separated after years of unhappiness. He moved out of their Etobicoke home over four years ago, but neither have bothered to begin divorce proceedings. Paunchy, middle-aged, and lacking social grace, Marcus was cynical about his chances of ever finding another partner. Six months after their separation, Marcus was referred to Jennifer by a co-worker.
I've never been popular with women. When me and my wife got married, it felt like we were settling for one another. I don't think we were ever in love-
To have a woman like Jennifer, 31, attractive and sexual, pay him any attention left his head swimming. After their first encounter, Marcus knew he'd found something missing in his life. Not as financially secure as Oliver, Marcus can only afford to see Jennifer four to five times a year. He might be able to go more frequently if he were to visit a less high-end, more affordable escort. But when I raised the question Marcus immediately rejected the notion-
We have a connection. I'd feel like I'm cheating on her.
2 years is a long time. a long, long, long time.